借りる means to borrow, 貸す means to lend, and 返す means to return something. The lender can be marked に or から with 借りる; the borrower commonly takes に with 貸す. 返す names the act of giving an item back and takes に for the recipient. Keep track of whose point of view each verb describes.
also written kariru / kasu / kaesu / 借りる / 貸す / 返す
借りる — to borrow, the thing comes to you · 貸す — to lend, the thing goes from you · 返す — to give it back, whichever way it first went
Sentences
借りる · the thing comes to you
polite。
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友達
ともだち ［0］
friend
noun · the source the book came from
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から
から
from
particle · the source, available with 借りる and not with 貸す
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本
ほん ［1］
book
noun · the thing that moved
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を
を
marks the direct object
particle · pronounced お
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借りました
かりました
borrowed
polite past of 借りる · the thing came towards the speaker
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I borrowed a book from a friend.
貸す · the thing goes from you
polite。
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友達
ともだち ［0］
friend
noun · now the destination, not the source
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に
に
to; at; into
particle · a point something reaches — a place, a time, a person, or a state
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本
ほん ［1］
book
noun · the same book, travelling the other way
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を
を
marks the direct object
particle · pronounced お
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貸しました
かしました
lent
polite past of 貸す · the thing left the speaker
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I lent my friend a book.
返す · giving it back
polite。
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この
この
this
demonstrative · the book in hand
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本
ほん ［1］
book
noun · the thing being returned
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を
を
marks the direct object
particle · pronounced お
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明日
あした ［3］
tomorrow
noun · read あした in speech, あす in announcements
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までに
までに
by
expression · a deadline, unlike まで which means 'until'
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図書館
としょかん ［2］
library
noun · the destination of the return, so it takes に
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に
に
to; at; into
particle · a point something reaches — a place, a time, a person, or a state
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返さなければなりません
かえさなければなりません
have to return
polite obligation of 返す · no choice is left
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I have to return this book to the library by tomorrow.
貸してくれる · how a request is actually phrased
polite。
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傘
かさ ［1］
umbrella
noun · the thing you want lent to you
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を
を
marks the direct object
particle · pronounced お
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貸して
かして
lend
て-form of 貸す · from the other person's side, so 貸す not 借りる
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くれません
くれません
won't you (for me)
polite negative of くれる · the giving verb aimed at the speaker
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か
か
(question)
particle · making it a request rather than a statement
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Could you lend me your umbrella?
借りる · a room, not an object
plain。
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東京
とうきょう ［0］
Tokyo
place name · where the room is, marked で for the setting
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で
で
in; at — where it happens
particle · where the action happens, or the manner it happens in
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部屋
へや ［2］
room
noun · rented rather than borrowed, and 借りる covers both
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を
を
marks the direct object
particle · pronounced お
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借りている
かりている
am renting
ている of 借りる · an ongoing state, not a single act
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I'm renting a room in Tokyo.
貸す · with a time limit
polite。
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来週
らいしゅう ［0］
next week
noun · the end point, so まで rather than までに
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まで
まで
until
particle · a stretch ending then, not a deadline
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貸します
かします
will lend
polite of 貸す · the speaker is the one giving it up
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よ
よ
(assurance)
particle · offering the information as news for the listener
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I'll lend it to you until next week.
Structure
友達に / 友達から＋借りる
友達に本を借りる. Both particles work; から makes the source slightly more explicit.
友達に＋貸す
友達に本を貸す. Only に — から would say you lent it *from* someone, which is not a thing.
図書館に＋返す
図書館に返す. The destination of the return, marked に like any other destination.
貸して＋くれる / もらう
貸してくれませんか. The natural way to ask — the direction is carried by くれる rather than by 借りる.
Meaning
The particle follows the direction of travel. 貸す sends the thing away from you, so the other person is the destination and takes に. 借りる brings it towards you, so the other person is a source — and a source can be marked から.
借りる also accepts に. 友達に借りる and 友達から借りる are both correct. The から version puts a little more weight on where it came from; neither is a mistake.
貸す does not mark its borrower with から. This is the asymmetry worth remembering. Use に for the borrower; から can occur elsewhere in a sentence to mark a different source or starting point.
Money keeps the same verbs. Borrowing money is 借りる, and a bank lending it is still 貸す — the banking vocabulary is built on it (貸付, 貸付金). 融資する and 返済する are a formal register for the same acts, not different verbs: 借金を返す and ローンを返す are ordinary Japanese for a debt of any size.
Watch out
友達から貸しました is the classic error. 貸す sends the thing away, so the other person is the destination: 友達に貸しました.
A request describes the other person's action, so it is 貸してくれませんか, not 借りてくれませんか. They do the lending.
返す returns a thing and is transitive; 帰る is a person going home and takes no object. The kanji share a reading family and nothing else.
It covers renting too — 部屋を借りる, 車を借りる. Whether money changes hands is not part of the verb's meaning.
Also asked
Both are correct. から marks the source a little more explicitly, に is slightly more neutral. Nobody will notice which one you chose.
Because the other person is where the thing is going, not where it came from. から marks a source, and lending has no source other than you.
Describe the other person's action: 貸してくれませんか or 貸していただけますか. 借りてもいいですか also works and asks for permission instead.
Yes. 部屋を借りる is renting a room, and the verb does not say whether money is involved. For the landlord's side the verb is 貸す again.
References
Shogakukan Digital Daijisen: 貸す — Defines lending and identifies 借りる as its opposite.
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